THE MANAGEMENT & BOARD OF TRUSTEES OF THE FRONTIER GUARDS SERVICE LIMITED

ATTENTION: RECEIVER,

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN,

THE MANAGEMENT & BOARD OF TRUSTEES OF THE FRONTIER GUARDS SERVICE LIMITED,
WISH TO NOTIFY YOU THAT WE HAVE ROUNDED UP ALL NECESSARY CONSULTATIONS WITH
THE BACKLAYS BANK EXECUTIVES HERE IN LONDON, AS REGARD TO THE DELIVERY OF YOUR
CONSIGNMENT.IT IS OUR PLEASURE TO NOTIFY YOU THAT THE EXECUTIVES OF THE BANK
HAVE APPROVED YOUR CONSIGNMENT OF TWO BOXES,WHICH WORTH USD $2.5 MILLION AS
STATED ON FILE AND RECORD,BUT HAVE NOT GRANTED US AN ALLOCATION FOR THE
IMMEDIATE DELIVERY OF YOUR CONSIGNMENT.

THE COMPANY MADE IT MANDATORY THAT YOU HAVE TO FILL OUT THE DELIVERY
APPLICATION FORM AND PRESENT THE REQUIREMENTS AS STIPULATED IN THE FORM TO
ENABLE US PROCESS THE NECESSARY DELIVERY DOCUMENTS RELATED TO YOUR CONSIGNMENT
AND FOR IMMEDIATE DELIVERY TO YOUR DOOR STEP.

FINALLY,WITH THE LEGAL DOCUMENT WE CONFIRM FROM THE CENTRAL BANK,WE CAN
DELIVER YOUR CONSIGNMENT TO YOU AT THE NEAREST AIRPORT AT YOUR VICINITY.

ANTICIPATING YOUR IMMEDIATE COMPLIANCE WITH OUR OBLIGATION TO ENABLE US SERVE
YOU BETTER.

SIGNED,

YOURS FAITHFULLY,
MRS.JESSICA FRANK.

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FBI Director

ANTI-TERRORIST AND MONETARY CRIMES DIVISION
Website: www.fbi.gov
ATTENTION FUND BENEFICIARY,

THIS IS AN OFFICIAL ADVICE FROM THE FBI FOREIGN REMITTANCE/TELEGRAPHIC
DEPT.,IT HAS COME TO OUR NOTICETHAT THE C.B.N BANK NIGERIA DISTRICT HAS
RELEASED10,500,000.00 U.S DOLLARS INTO BANK OF AMERICA IN YOURNAME AS THE
BENEFICIARY, BY INHERITANCE MEANS.THEC.B.N BANK NIGERIA KNOWING FULLY WELLTHAT
THEY DO NOTHAVE ENOUGH FACILITIES TO EFFECT THIS PAYMENT FROM THEUNITED KINGDOM
TO YOUR ACCOUNT, USED WHAT WE KNOW AS ASECRET DIPLOMATIC TRANSIT PAYMENT S.T.D.P
TO PAY THISFUND THROUGH WIRE TRANSFER,THEY USED THIS MEANS TOCOMPLETE THE
PAYMENT.

THEY ARE STILL, WAITING FOR CONFIRMATION FROM YOU ONTHE ALREADY
TRANSFERRED FUNDS WHICH WAS MADE IN DIRECTTRANSFER SO THAT THEY CAN DO FINAL
CREDITING TO YOUR ACCOUNT. SECRET DIPLOMATIC PAYMENTS ARE NOT MADEUNLESS THE
FUNDS ARE RELATED TO TERRORIST ACTIVITIESWHY MUST YOUR PAYMENT BE MADE IN SECRET
TRANSFER , IFYOUR TRANSACTION IS LEGITIMATE,IF YOU ARE NOT ATERRORIST, THEN WHY
DID YOU NOT RECEIVE THE MONEYDIRECTLY INTO YOUR ACCOUNT,THIS IS A PURE CODED
,MEANSOF PAYMENT? RECORDS WHICH WE HAVE HAD WITH THIS METHOD OFPAYMENT IN
THE PAST HAS ALWAYS BEEN RELATED TOTERRORIST ACTS, WE DONOT WANT YOU TO GET INTO
TROUBLEAS SOON AS THESE FUNDS REFLECT IN YOUR ACCOUNT IN THEU.S.A, SO IT IS OUR
DUTY AS A WORD WIDE COMMISSION TOCORRECT THIS LITTLE PROBLEM BEFORE THIS FUND
WILL BECREDITED INTO YOUR PERSONAL ACCOUNT.

DUE TO THE INCREASED DIFFICULTY AND UNNECESSARYSCRUTINY BY THE AMERICAN
AUTHORITIES WHEN FUNDS COMEFROM OUTSIDE OF EUROPE, AND THE MIDDLE EAST, THE
F.B.IBANK COMMISSION FOR EUROPE HAS STOPPED THE TRANSFERON ITS WAY TO DELIVER
PAYMENT OF $10,500,000.00 TODEBIT YOUR RESERVE ACCOUNT AND PAY YOU THROUGH
ASECURED DIPLOMATIC TRANSIT ACCOUNT (S.D.T.A). WEGOVERN AND OVERSEES FUNDS
TRANSFER FOR THE WORLD BANKAND THE REST OF THE WORLD.

WE ADVICE YOU CONTACT US IMMEDIATELY,AS THE FUNDSHAVE BEEN STOPPED AND ARE
BEING HELD IN OUR CUSTODY,UNTIL YOU CAN BE ABLE TO PROVIDE US WITH A
DIPLOMATICIMMUNITY SEAL OFTRANSFER(DIST) WITHING 3 DAYS FROMTHE WORLD LOCAL BANK
THAT AUTHORIZE THE TRANSFER FROMWHERE THE FUNDS WAS TRANSFERRED FROM TO CERTIFY
THATTHE FUNDS THAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO RECEIVE FROM NIGERIAARE ANTI TERRORIST/DRUG
FREE OR WE SHALL HAVE CAUSE TOCROSS AND IMPOUND THE PAYMENT,WE SHALL RELEASE
THEFUNDS IMMEDIATELY WE RECEIVE THIS LEGAL DOCUMENTS
.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
We have decided to contact you directly to acquirethe proper verifications
and proof from you to showthat you are the rightful person to receive this
fund,because of the amount involve,we want to make sure isa clean and legal
money you are about to receive. Beinformed that the fund are now in United State
in yourname , but right now we have ask the bank not torelease the fund to
anybody that comes to them ,unless we ask them to do so,because we have to
carryout ourinvestigations first before releasing the fundto you. Note that the
fund is in the BANK OF AMERICA right now, but we have ask them not to credit the
fundto you yet, because we need a solid proof andverifications from you before
releasing the funds.

So to this regards you are to re-assure and proof tous that what you are
about to receive is a clean moneyby sending to us FBI Identification Record and
alsoDiplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer(DIST) to satisfyto us that the money
your about to receive islegitimate and real money. You are to forward
thedocuments to us immediately if you have it in yourpossession, if you don?t
have it let us know so thatwe will direct and inform you where to obtain
thedocument and send to us so that we will ask the bankholding the funds the
Bank Of America to go aheadCrediting your account immediately.

This Documents are to be issued to you from theWorld Local Bank that
Authorized the transfer, so getback to us immediately if you don?have the
document sothat we will inform you the particular place to obtainthe document in
United Kingdom U.K, because we havecome to realize that the fund was Authorized
by H.S.B.C Bank in London. An FBI Identification Record and Diplomatic
Immunity Seal Of Transfer(DIST) often referred to as aCriminal History Record or
Rap Sheet, is a listing ofcertain information taken from finger print submission
sretained by the FBI in connection with arrests and, insome instances, federal
employment,naturalization, ormilitary service.THESE CONDITION IS VALID UNTIL TH
OF 20THE OCT2008 AFTER WE SHALL TAKE ACTIONS ON CANCELLINGTHE PAYMENT AND THEN
CHARGE YOU FOR ILLEGALLY MOVINGFUNDS OUT OF NIGERIA .
GUARANTEE: FUNDS WILL BERELEASED ON CONFIRMATION OF THE DOCUMENT.


FBI Director
Robert S. Mueller, III

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The Vibrator !!!

As a woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from within. Opening the door, she observed her daughter with a vibrator.

Shocked, she asked:' what in the world are you doing?'

The daughter replied:' mom, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone.'

The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz coming from the the other side of the closed bedroom door. Upon entering the room, he observed his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator. To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter said:' dad I'm thirty-five, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone.'

A couple days later, the wife came home from a shopping trip, placed the groceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming from, of all places, the living room. She entered that area and observed her husband sitting on the couch, downing a cold beer, and staring at the T.V. The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing like crazy.

The wife asked: 'What the fuck are you doing?'

The husband replied:' I'm watching football with my son-in-law.'

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