Rants and Raves: 4/8/07

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Computer Error Explained / Have You Ever Had An ID 10 T Error ?

HAROLD THE COMPUTER GUY

I was having trouble with my computer.
So I called Harold, the computer guy, to come over.
Harold clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.
He gave me a bill for a minimum service call.

As he was walking away, I called after him, "So, what was wrong?"

He replied, "It was an ID ten T error."

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, "An ID ten T Error? What's that . In case I need to fix it again?"

Harold grinned.... "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"

"No," I replied.

"Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out."

So I wrote it down.

I D 1 0 T

I used to like Harold...

Technorati Tags:id10t error, computer jokes, computer humor, computing for dummies, harold the computer guy
Generated By Technorati Tag Generator

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Coldwater

Can cold water really clean dishes?
This is for all the germ conscious folks
that worry about using cold water to clean.

John went to visit his 90 year old
grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Georgia.

After spending a great evening chatting the
night away, John's grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast.
However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate, and questioned
his grandfather asking, "Are these plates clean?" His grandfather replied,
"They're as clean as cold water can get em. Just you go ahead and finish
your meal, Sonny!"

For lunch the old man made hamburgers.
Again, John was concerned about the plates as his appeared to have tiny
specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, "Are you sure
these plates are clean?"

Without looking up the old man said, "I told
you before, Sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get em. Now
don't you fret, I don't want to hear 'nother word about it!" Later that
afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving, his
grandfather's dog started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass. John
yelled, "Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car".

Without diverting his attention from the
football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted ..

"COLDWATER, GO LAY DOWN!!!!"

Meet Coldwater....

Technorati Tags:coldwater, humor, dog jokes, dog humor
Generated By Technorati Tag Generator

Eric Diop Wants To Assure Me This Is Not A Hoax / Good Luck Eric Diop

TEL:+221 4409966
Email:ericdiop_1@libero.it

Compliments.

Before I introduce myself, I wish to inform you that this letter is not
a hoax mail and I urge you to treat it serious. We
want to transfer to an oversea account($16,700.000.00 USD) Sixteen
Million Seven Hundred Thousand United States Dollars)from
one of the banks located in Europe.I want to ask you, If you are not
capable to quietly look for a reliable and honest person who will be
capable and fit to provide either an existing bank account or to set up a
new Bank a/c immediately to receive this money, even an empty a/c
canserve to receive this money, as long as you will remain honest to me till
the end of this important business,I am trusting in you and believing
in God that you will never let me down either now or in future.

I am Mr Eric Diop a personal assistant to late Andreas Schranner.
During the course of his bank's last week auditing,it was
discovered that since his death no one has come forward to lay claim to
this funds.So the bank issued me a memo to provide
his next of kin or forfeit the funds.

This account was opened with the bank in 1999 and since 2000 nobody has
operated on this account again, after going through
some old files in my records,I discovered that my late client died
without a [Heir/WILL] hence the money is floating and if I
do not remit this money out urgently it will be forfeited for nothing.

The owner of this account Mr. Andreas Schranner a German property
magnate who unfortunately lost his life in the plane crash
of AF4590 German Concorde which crashed on Monday, 31 July, 2000, 13:22
GMT 14:22 UK,including his family leaving nobody as
next of kin.No other person knows about this account or any thing
concerning it,the account has no other beneficiary and my
investigation proved to me as well that the account is a secret
account.

Please you can view this site for more information about the crash.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

The total amount involved is Sixteen million Seven Hundred Thousand
United States Dollars only [$16,700.000.00] and we wish
to transfer this money into a safe foreigners account abroad. But I
don't know any foreigner, I am only contacting you as a
foreigner because this money can not be approved to a local person
here, but to a foreigner who has information about the
account, which I shall give to you upon your positive response.

I am revealing this to you with believe in God that you will never let
me down in this business, you are the first and the
only person that I am contacting for this business, so please reply
urgently so that I will inform you the next step to take
urgently.At the conclusion of this business, you will be given 30% of
the total amount,65% will be for us, while 5% will be
for expenses both parties might have incurred during the process of
transferring. I look forward to your earliest reply.

PLEASE,TREAT THIS PROPOSAL AS TOP SECRET.You can reach me directly on
my telephone number for more clarification +2214409966.

Best Regards,
Eric Diop,
Email:ericdiop_1@libero.it

Technorati Tags:mr. eric diop, mr. andreas schranner, af4590 german condorde, 419 scams, nigerian 419er's, nigerian scams, uk lottery scam, email scams,
Generated By Technorati Tag Generator

Monday, April 9, 2007

Mrs.AISHA MOHAMMED.Has To Much Trust In Me

From:MRS AISHA MOHAMMED.
Attn:The Managing Director
Dear Beloved
Assalamu alaikum!!!
My contacting you is based on trust. I have seen war and I have seen
peace, I have seen riches and I have seen people die of hunger on daily
bases. And I am quite certain that life is vanity; the only life worth
living is a life of service to the almighty One ALLAH, most merciful,
most compassionate and most benevolent. This is the reason for my
present
decision based absolutely on ALLAH.
Before I proceed, may I humbly introduce myself to your goodself, My
Name is Mrs. Aisha mohammed, an Iraqi refugee ,my husband was until
recently, one of the personal aid to the president of Iraq who was
formerly
overthrown out of power .
Prior to this last serious crisis that is still ravaging in my
country,which recently led to misfortune of our government and my late
husband
position as the personal aid to the president, ,We inherited the sum of
US$16 million.The funds were originally gotten from my late husband
proceeds. My late husband was able to safe guard the fund with a very
good
diplomatic contact from my Country and deposited it in thailand. .I
have decided to contact you because I am interested in investing in
your
country which is investment friendly. Please kindly guide and assist me
in making the right investment since I am also interested in buying a
residential property as I will be moving with my only son musa in over
there as soon as every thing regarding technical and logictics details
is worked out and ascertained to our respective satisfaction. In view
of
your participation,I am ready to give you a good negotiable percentage
for your assistance,or better still commit it into viable Joint venture
projects with you.,be assured that you stand no risk of any kind as the
funds belong to me and my only survived son musa. As soon as I get your
consent, we will quickly move this fund to your country for investment
. However, upon your acceptance to work as my partner, you can contact
me with my private e-mail for more details.
, I strongly believe that associating with you to embark on this and
other business ventures will derive a huge success here after, please
include you private contact telephone number and private e-mail when
you replying to me. please reply me only in my private
email:mrsaishamohammed@myway.com

Yours Sincerely.
Mrs.AISHA MOHAMMED.

Technorati Tags:mrs. aisha mohammed, mrsaishamohammed@myway.com, assalamu alaikum, 419 scams, nigerian scams, uk lottery scam, email scams, lnigerian 419 scams,
Generated By Technorati Tag Generator

Sunday, April 8, 2007

More Email Scams Hit My Inbox / Watch Out For These Sleazy Scumbags

THUNDER BALL LOTTERY.
UNITED KINGDOM.

We are pleased to inform you of the announcement today of Winners of the Thunder ball Lottery march 2007 mega draws. Your company or personal e-mail address, is attached to a Ticket number 067-123-09, with a serial number 14127 drew the Lucky Winning Numbers
05-08-14-15-30-07.

You have therefore been awarded the total lump sum pay out of £5,500,000.00GBP credited to File Ref No: TBL/ 16-NB-LM45.

You must contact the claims department by e-mail;

Name:Mr.Benjamin Clifford
E-mail:thunderballclaimsofficer1@yahoo.co.uk
Phone:+44 70457 10669

For us to verify your prize and make it available for transfer via our Courier Company which, send us the information below;

Your Full Name(s):
Contact address:
Phone:
Age:
Sex:
Occupation:
Country:
Marital Status:
Winning E-mail:
File Ref No:

Congratulations once again from all our staff for being a part of our Promotions program.

Mrs.Stacy Cyril

*************

Ref: JU/03/357856256/NL
Lucky Numbers 10, 11, 19,20,23,1 (6),
Your ticket number:IL252/03/78 with Serial
number IL25278NL drew the lucky number: won you the lottery prize in
the
2nd category
you have just won yourself - Fifteen Million Euros -in the
satellite
softwareemail lottery conducted by TRIPPLE WINS INTERNATIONAL
SWEEPSTAKES
here in
United Kingdom in which e-mail addresses are picked randomly by
software powered by the Internet. Contact our Promotion ClaimsAgent.
MR.KELVIN OWEN Email:kelvinowenclaimsdesk2@yahoo.co.uk
1.FullNames:,2.Address:,3.Age:,4.Sex:,5.Marital
Status:,6.Occupation:,7.Phonenumbers,8.Country

************

I am Jerry Chow ,the human resources co-ordinatior of TAO AND WANG ASSOCIATES Hong kong,we deal in all kinds of raw materials arts and craft which we export into
America/Canada/Europe.We have been doing business in your country for the past 2years. We are searching for company representatives who can help us to recieve money from our customers.Customers will make payments through you as our payment officer. It is on this note that we seek credible individuals/corporate bodies to act as our representative in your country.You do not have any financial obligation on your part. Note that, as our representative, you will receive 10%(ten percent) of any payment made by our customers through you.Please, to facilitate the conclusion of this offer if accepted, do send me promptly by email the following:
(1)Your full names,
(2)Contact address,
(3)cell Phone/fax numbers,
(4)Occupation and
5)Age
send it to: taowangassociatesltd@yahoo.com.hk
LOOKING FORWARD TO WORKING WITH YOU

**************

CARTER GROUP PLC.
Thames valley park,Reading Berkshire RG6 1PT United Kingdom

Dear Sir/Madam,
How are you doing,I am Ken Woodbridge,Group Manager of CARTER GROUP
PLC based In the United Kingdom. We deal in raw-materials such as
non-metallic minerals such as Calcite,BarytesDolomite,
Mica and export to
America,Europe And Africa. we also cater to various industries and they
include
Paints, Rubber, Plastics, Construction chemicals.
We are searching for representatives who canhelp us establish a medium
of getting to our customers in America and Europe as well as making
payments through you to us.
Please if you are interested in transacting business with us we will be
very glad to hear from you.

Please contact us: (kenwoodbridge1@yahoo.co.uk)
Fax:+44870 068 3275

Subject to your satisfaction you will be given the opportunity to
negotiate.
Such intrested persons are to serve our endless clientele list by
receiving funds on behalf of the company,making payment through you to
us,as
well as projecting our interest.Individuals who are interested in this
opportunity are to understand that their money is not required to serve
the company but rather,they are to benefit from acting as such
representative on any transaction.Incentives include 10%commission on
any
transaction,conducted with our numerous customer,and an upward reviewer
after each quarter annually.
Interested persons are to fill the form below
FULL LEGAL NAMES:
CONTACT ADDRESS:
AGE:
SEX:
OCCUPATION:
E-MAIL ADDRESS
TEL:
FAX:
ZIP/POSTAL CODE:
COUNTRY:

Kindest Regards
Mr Ken Woodbridge
Group Manager