CONGRATULATIONS! YOUR EMAIL ID HAS WON UK MICROSOFT LOTTERY!!! / Don't Be Fooled By This Well Done Looking Scam

 UK MICROSOFT JACKPOT LOTTERY

                                THE WINNING NUMBERS

                                -----                                                      

                                        

                     

 

REF NO: MSW/56B-672GH/L
BATCH: 4583JL/WIN

 MICROSOFT EMAIL LOTTERY PROMOTION: UNITED KINGDOM

 

Finally, today, we announce the results  of the MICROSOFT MEGA JACKPOT LOTTERY  EMAIL DRAWS held on  April 24th, 2007. Your company or your personal e-mail address, attached to winning number 23-76-06-54-42-100, With serial number 647489, consequently won in the Tenth category.Since the draw  was conducted through zonal batching of the emails sampled,and the globe was divided, in this instance ,into two zones,you are hereby notified that your winning falls under British  Zone,and hence you are to be paid by our British Payment Centre.

 

You have been approved for lump sums pay out of £2,000,000 British Pounds Sterling  cash and it's equivalence in USD is 3,863,500.02 USD Credited to file REF NO: MSW/56B-672GH/L and winning number---- Selection process was carried out through random sampling in our computerized email selection machine (TOPAZ) from a database of over 1,000,000 email addresses drawn from all the continents of the world.

The online draws was conducted by a random selection of email addresses
from 29,031 lists of E-mail addresses of individuals and corporate bodies picked by an advanced automated random computer search from the internet. No ticket were sold but all email addresses were assigned to different ticket numbers for representation. This is to encourage our prominent Microsoft Internet Explorer users all over the world, and for the  Continuing use of E-mail facilities.

 

Your fund has been insured with your REF NO: MSW/56B-672GH/L and winning number----- To claim your winning prize,contact the COURIER DEPARTMENT by email below for Collection  of your prize to you.

 

The COURIER MANAGER :
Name:Mr.Peter Kelly

Tel:+44-704-570-1108

global_deliverycourierservice@yahoo.co.uk

 

 

 

In order to avoid unnecessary delays and complications, please remember to quote your reference and winning numbers to the COURIER DEPARTMENT iMMEDIATELY FOR VERIFICATION . You are to keep all lotto information away from the general public especially your winning serial ,and file reference numbers.

(This is important as a case of double claims will not be entertained)

PLEASE, NOTE THAT YOU ARE TO INCLUDE ALL THE DATA BELOW WHEN CONTACTING THE COURIER DEPARTMENT:

 

1.Full Name:.............................................................

 

2.Address:................................................................

 

3.Nationality:...........................................................

 

4.Sex:...................................................................

 

5.Age:.........................Date of Birth:............................

 

6.Occupation:............................................................

 

7.Home Tel:..........Mobile Tel:................Fax:.................

8.State of Origin:.....................Country:.......................

 

                                               

           

            

                                                   

 Dr.MONICA SHAGAYA                                       Mrs. Maurrine H. Diane

              Online Co-ordinator                                                 Secretary     

 

                                    

                                       LOTTERY SPONSOR  

                                                   Microsoft Corporation U.K.

                                                 
 

____________________________________________________________________________________

                                                                  Note;

Do not reply this mail, you are to contact the COURIER DEPARTMENT immediately by email. Microsoft Electronic Mail .

Just incase you need any clearification please contact our CUSTOMER CARE UNIT VIA EMAIL:info_microsoftonlinepromo2007@yahoo.co.uk

Lottery is approved and Licensed by the The International Association of Gaming Regulators (IAGR).

---

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Fox News's Loss Is CNN's Gain / Kiran (Legs) Chetry Leaves Fox & Friends

Kiran Chetry has left Fox News for CNN. I like Kiran and hope this is a good move for her. Most of the people at Fox make me sick and I always thought Kiran never really fit in with the rest of them.

Steve Doocy was OK but Brian Kilmeade is a total douchbag. Anyone who says the things Kilmeade has about marijuana and "Medical Marijuana" in particular has got to smell of vinegar. Between Kilmeade and E.D.Hill they have no idea what they are spewing out on the subject.
Anyway, this is just my way of saying I'm happy Kiran Chetry has gotten out of the "Fair and Balanced" world of Fox News and moved over to CNN... BJC

Is FNC Letting Kiran Go? Letter Says Agent Treated Net With "Arrogant Disregard"


First on TVNewser: We may not see Kiran Chetry on Fox News Channel anymore.

The news update and weekend anchor was in the middle of contract negotiations with the net, but they are no longer interested in matching any other offer she receives, according to a letter sent to her agent this afternoon.

Here's the PDF of the letter.

Kiran Chetry Yahoo Group

Kiran has a "Leg Up" on the F&F set


Kiran as Laura Croft




Kiran/Pogo Stick


Kiran/Kilmeade Cat Fight



Kiran/Page/Courtney Leg Show



Kiran Has A Fine Ass !!!



E.D. Hill And Those Famous Legs


















Gretchen Carlson Shows The Goods



















The Ladies Of F&F's
Reporterscaps.com
Wide World Of Women
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Videos Of Kiran And More
All Alisyn
All E.D.


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What Not To Say To A Cop

NEVER SAY TO A COP

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas )

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer?

7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.. ?

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around.. That's how far ahead of me they are.

12. When the Officer says "Gee Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

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Dead Duck

Dead Duck

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her
pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the
bird's chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so
sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed owner wailed,
"Are you sure"? "Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied. "How can
you be so sure"? She protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on
him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a
few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner
looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws
on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then
looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog
and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a cat. The cat
jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to
foot. The cat sat back on it haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and
strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is
most definitely, 100 percent certifiably, a dead duck." Then the vet turned
to his computer terminal hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he
handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
"$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead"? "The vet
shrugged. I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have
been $20, but with the lab report and the cat scan, it's now $150."

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Jewish Lady On The Beach / George Carlin's Solution To Save Gasoline

A recently widowed Jewish lady was sitting on
a beach towel at Ormond Beach, Florida.
She looked up and saw that a man her age had walked up,
placed his blanket on the sand nearby and had begun to read a book.
Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "Hi there, how >are you?"
"Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book.
"I love the beach. Do you come here often?" she asked.
"First time since my wife passed away last year,"
he replied, and again turned back to his book.
"Do you live around here?" she asked.
"Yes, I live over in Plantation Bay,"
he answered, and then resumed reading.
Trying to find a topic of common interest, Sarah persisted.
"Do you like pussy cats?"

With that, the man threw his book down,
jumped off his blanket onto hers,
tore off both their swimsuits and gave her the most passionate ride of her
life!

As the cloud of sand began to settle, Sarah gasped
and asked the man,
"How did you know that was what I wanted?"
The man replied,

"How did you know my name was Katz ?"

*************************************************

Young Afghan


Team owner Jeffery Lurie had put together the perfect team for the
Philadelphia Eagles.

The only thing missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all
the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he
Couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl victory.

One night while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan.

In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghani soldier
with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a
window from 80 yards away. Then he threw another from 50 yards
down a chimney, and finally hit a passing car going 80 miles per hour.

"I've got to get this guy!" Lurie said to himself " He has the perfect arm!"

He brings the young Afghan to the States and teaches him the great
game of football ...sure enough the Eagles go on to win the Super
Bowl.

The young Afghan is hailed as a hero of football, and when the coach
asks him what he wants, all the young man wants to do is call his
mother. "Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl.

"I don't want to talk to you," the old Muslim woman says. "You
deserted us. You are not my son."

"Mother, I don't think you understand," pleads the son, "I've just
won the greatest sporting event in the world!"

"No! Let me tell you," his mother retorts, "At this very moment there
are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble.
Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last
week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!"

The old lady pauses then tearfully says,

" I will never forgive you for making us move to Philadelphia!

**************************************************

From George Carlin's Solution to Save Gasoline:


Bush wants us to cut the amount of gas we use. The best way to stop using
so much gas is to deport 11 million illegal immigrants! That would be 11
million less people using our gas. The price of gas would come down. Bring
our troops home from Iraq to guard the border. When they catch an illegal
immigrant crossing the border, hand him a canteen, rifle and some ammo and
ship him to Iraq Tell him if he wants to come to America then he must serve
a tour in the military. Give him a soldier's pay while he's there and tax
him on it. After his tour, he will be allowed to become a citizen since he
defended this country. He will also be registered to be taxed and be a
legal patriot. This option will probably deter illegal immigration and
provide a solution for the troops in Iraq and the aliens trying to make a
better life for themselves. If they refuse to serve, ship them to Iraq
anyway, without the canteen, rifle or ammo. Problem solved. If you think
this is a good solution to both the problems, forward it to your friends.

I just did.


George Carlin

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/carlingas.asp

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