Dead Duck

Dead Duck

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her
pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the
bird's chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so
sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed owner wailed,
"Are you sure"? "Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied. "How can
you be so sure"? She protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on
him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a
few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner
looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws
on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then
looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog
and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a cat. The cat
jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to
foot. The cat sat back on it haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and
strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is
most definitely, 100 percent certifiably, a dead duck." Then the vet turned
to his computer terminal hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he
handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
"$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead"? "The vet
shrugged. I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have
been $20, but with the lab report and the cat scan, it's now $150."

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